![]() ![]() When you give me the silent-treatment, that damages my positive feelings. If you are on the receiving end of a snippy, clipped semi-silent treatment, you can say something like: Dad/Mom, I love you so much and I want our relationship to be enjoyable and supportive. If it is a parent and you are an adult who doesn’t live with them, you can learn to set healthy boundaries for yourself. If you give it to me how to#If not, go to therapy on your own so you can learn how to handle their behavior in a way that is healthy for you. Getting your spouseto go to therapy with you may not always be possible, but if the relationships is important to them and you feel that their behavior is irreparably damaging it, you might be in a position to strongly encourage even demand it of them. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy might be helpful.A couples therapist who is skilled in these methods might be a good choice. Since the silent treatment is often (though not always) a sign of an immature or otherwise dysfunctional emotional life, therapy can really be a help, especially goal-oriented, behavior-oriented therapy that also works on managing the thoughts and emotions. ![]() Obviously, if you are in a close or unavoidably close relationship with thisperson such as a spouse, your responseshould take this into consideration. It’s best to do this if you truly do not feel affected by his behavior and can even laugh it off. Not letting the perpetrator witness your negative feelings and showing him that you aren’t bothered by his behavior may be the only thing you need to get him to stop.Īnother response that might get the person to stop is to tell him that his behavior appears immature, controlling, desperate, manipulative, ridiculous, etc. That’s because someone who uses this tactic feeds onthe negative emotions of his victim. In general, for people you aren’t close with and may not see often, telling someone that how theirsilent treatment hurts or angers you isnot be a great idea. Or you say, “I’d like to do that,” and he pretends he hasn’t heard you and remains completely silent, as if you do not exist or as if what you said was never said. For example, your boss requests volunteers for a project that requires skills you have, perhaps even unique skills. It’s a favorite tactic of particularly infantile narcissists. ![]() This is disempowering you and “one-upping” you with silence. When the abuser completely ignores what you’ve said, changing the subject or just staying silent to a question or statement that generally requires a response. If you cared you’d apologize for what you did. When you ask what’s bothering them, they say: If you cared about me/loved me, you’d know what’s bothering me. Your spouse refuses to speak to you or stomps around answering you in curt, clipped one-word answers. This is punishing and disempowering you with silence. Even if you have a legitimate reason, you are generally on time, and you apologize profusely your silent-treatment might include the cold-shoulder from your friend or answering you in curt, clipped sentences while refusing or barely acknowledging your apology.ģ.When the abuser gives you the cold-shoulder and refuses to speak to you because you’ve said/done something that bothers them and will not even tellyou what it is that you’ve said or done, leaving you powerless to make an apology. This is punishing you with silence.Īn example might be if you were late to meet a friendat the theater and you missed the event because of your tardiness. When the abuser gives you the cold-shoulder and refuses to speak to you because you’ve said/done something that bothers them and will not accept any reasonably sincere apology. ![]()
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